I wont ever move on

Today is a winding road
that's taking me to places
that I didn't want to go
Today in the blink of an eye
I'm holding on to something
and I do not know why
I tried

I tried to read between the lines
I tried to look in your eyes
I want a simple explanation
For what I'm feeling inside
I gotta find a way out
Maybe there's a way out

Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer
Do you know you're unlike any other?
You'll always be my thunder, and I said
Your eyes are the brightest of all the colors
I don't wanna ever love another
You'll always be my thunder
So bring on the rain
And bring on the thunder

Today is a winding road
Tell me where to start
and tell me something I don't know
Today I'm on my own
I can't move a muscle
and I can't pick up the phone
I don't know (I don't know, I don't know, I don't know)

And now I'm itching for the tall grass
And longing for the breeze
I need to step outside
Just to see if I can breathe
I gotta find a way out
Maybe theres a way out

Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer
Do you know you're unlike any other?
You'll always be my thunder, and I said
Your eyes are the brightest of all the colors
I don't wanna ever love another
You'll always be my thunder
So bring on the rain

Yeah I'm walking on a tightrope
I'm wrapped up in vines
I think we'll make it out
But you just gotta give me time
Strike me down with lightning
Let me feel you in my veins
I wanna let you know how much I feel your pain

Today is a winding road
that's taking me to places
that I didn't want to go

Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer
Do you know you're unlike any other?
You'll always be my thunder, and I said
Your eyes are the brightest of all the colors
I don't wanna ever love another
You'll always be my thunder
So bring on the rain
And bring on the thunder, and I said
Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer
Do you know you're unlike any other?
You'll always be my thunder
So bring on the rain
Oh baby bring on the pain
And listen to the thunder

Boys like girls- Thunder

I hate myself for being me

If there was something I could change,
That would first be me,
I'm depressed, I'm down,
I used to have pride in my academics,
now all that's left is stupidity,
I wish to change myself,
to turn back time, erasing all the stupid mistakes i made,
and never to have met someone like you,
its hard to live on like this,
knowing that I'm living on an empty hope,
that lies within a fool's dream,
I cant think of anything else, but you,
and also knowing that the chance of getting to be with you is,
as good as snowing in Malaysia,
I cant stand living knowing that I like you and knowing i will never be with you,
and
I cant live without you,
What's left is an idiot's dream.

I never hated myself more. I envy you

Busy busy time

As expected, I'm back once again after a long break from blogging, it's been a while and I've been too busy to put anything up. Too many things happened at a short time. Car accident, Daughtry's concert, food...food...and more food! lol anyway my food blog is...officially gone...crap HTML and have to start from scratch again. A new link for foooooooood : http://food-indulgence.blogspot.com/. I'll revive everything when I'm done with it. Have to edit background. Sorry again guys! Next place to try : Jalan Alor area! (thx to a friend :P)

Here in my home

Have you seen the video? Its a pretty cool collaboration between the Malaysian artistes, produced and composed by Pete Teo. I'm sure u guys must have heard it on radio already. It's free for download, Mp3, video, and all versions, even for Ipod too. It consists of most malaysian singers, actors, performers etc. I love the song, its really surprisingly nice for a Malaysian made stuff. Malaysia finally boleh!, for once -_-".Heck you can even see Shebby Singh there. There's Ning Baizura, Jaclyn Victor, Daniel Lee, Suki, Reshmonu, Amber Chia....etc etc. Here's the video :

For further downloads go to http://www.malaysianartistesforunity.info/?page_id=19

or just click on the link below:



enjoy :D

Happy Wesak 2008

Happy wesak to all! Been a tiring day today. Drove all the way to the Brickfields temple today. It was hell packed as usual and of course, wesak day wouldnt be complete with the sights of an influx of beggars there. As much as there was to pity them, it was too sore of an eyesight for them to be there. They stalked people and also littered everywhere and from what I've heard they belong to a group of syndicates. Anyway, I despise the people who so called went there to pray today. The free food and drinks stall was full of greedy oh-its-free-so-lets-sapu type of people, and you know what? They littered all over the temple. Sort of gratitude isnt it? Dont pray la even better. Nobody on the right mind would bless them to have a better life. Hope karma gives them what they deserve. And anyway, this is a picture of my new hair, its blur coz its taken with my E398 Motorola camera, the ones taken with my camera cannot be uploaded as i lost my card reader. Anyway here it is:

Baaaack

Gosh, assignment kills. Had a very horrible month filled with it. Still not much to update though. PC fair was last Friday- Sunday. Went there on both Saturday and Sunday to get my 2 Extertan Hard Disks of 160 gb and 320 mb each. Came back on sunday to get my memory card. Then saw a reaaaally nice notebook skin.so tapau it.

It looks so cool on my laptop haha. Wanna post pics of it but no time to take photo. So that will take a while to post up too. It's also nice to meet a friend or two working in PC fair. And finally, clubbing for me tmr! wanted to go there for ages edi.

Some new food places to indulge in too. Will update on the food corner soon ! Hopefully can start reviewing food. We'll see soon xD.

Till then!

Assignment fever

Same me same old life. All last minute work, this is what you get hahahahaha. Kinda deserved it. Have to push my limits to complete my assignments by this week or...haha face the consequences. Some new improvements in my life. Been happier these days. Cant blog much, have to go do my work, tomorrow. Now I'm gonna sleep xD nitey nites

Robotic life

Its been a long time since I last blogged( yes, I say this almost every time). My lifestyle? Havent changed a bit. I'm starting to feel that life these days...are kinda robotic. No more unexpected events or exciting stuff to be done. Its always been the same nowadays.

Wake up
Uni
Eat sleep etc etc...
or Work(sundays)
Done for the day

Only two differences in every week. A futsal event on friday or a rare movie occasion once in a while. During my Ausmat days, things are totally random. People calling me up at odd times to go for outings....CC, chilling, movie, bitching, sleepovers. I really miss those days.

And I'm kinda craving for clubbing nowadays, wonder whats wrong with me. Kinda seem to love the extremely repulsive(to a certain extend) music beating,druming, screeching in your ears.

I jsut wish it was just a bit more eventful. Everyone's been pretty busy lately. Assignments, exams, financial and personal reasons. Its just....boring.

Hope things will change for the better soon. Am starting to feel loneliness.

Another question, should I opt to transfer to Monash Caulfield, Australia for the second sem? Still thinking if it's worth it. Any advices?

If i choose to just go there for 1 sem, its kinda waste of time, since its so short but I pay local fees and I dont haveto retake subjects that I failed but if I opt for the full transfer, I have to retake 2 extra subjects. Argh....this is...confusing

If you're not the one

If you're not the one

If you’re not the one then why does my soul feel glad today?
If you’re not the one then why does my hand fit yours this way?
If you are not mine then why does your heart return my call
If you are not mine would I have the strength to stand at all

I'll never know what the future brings
But I know you're here with me now
We’ll make it through
And I hope you are the one I share my life with

I don’t want to run away but I can’t take it, I don’t understand
If I’m not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am?
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

If I don’t need you then why am I crying on my bed?
If I don’t need you then why does your name resound in my head?
If you’re not for me then why does this distance maim my life?
If you’re not for me then why do I dream of you as my wife?

I don’t know why you’re so far away
But I know that this much is true
We’ll make it through And I hope you are the one I share my life with
And I wish that you could be the one I die with
And I pray in you’re the one I build my home with
I hope I love you all my life

I don’t want to run away but I can’t take it, I don’t understand
If I’m not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

‘Cause I miss you, body and soul so strong that it takes my breath away
And I breathe you into my heart and pray for the strength to stand today
‘Cause I love you, whether it’s wrong or right
And though I can’t be with you tonight
You know my heart is by your side

I don’t want to run away but I can’t take it, I don’t understand
If I’m not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am
Is there any way that I could stay in your arms

Uni life....again...and updates!!!

Gaaaah, and I thought 4 months was long enough. Time flies too fast. Holidays is now over and assignment fever and rushes has started....again. Back to Monash. Yeah, i dont sound too enthusiastic about it. Anyways, I have been quite busy lately.My definition of busy is actually playing card games, board games or football and also CC-ing. Been quite disoriented for a while now but gotta stop this lifestyle now. Need to concentrate in exams soon, or die....more failures again.

And its really very sad for a student like Nian Ning for her time to come so soon. She was my Ausmat coursemate and it really was so shocking to read about someone you know pass away.Prayers to her and may she rest in peace. Please do go sign the petition at buscrashnomore.blogspot.com to stop these accidents occuring again.Its also the time to start appreciating your family, friends, pets and anything else as life c

One thing i also really hate is that election time has once returned and crap posters,banners etc is up all over the place.Its just annoying driving and having to look at all the insincere faces smiling all around. I hope they take out everything after its over(they usually dont). Its the time to be nice to citizens and start visiting houses and attending charity events. Other than that, not even a strand of their hair can be seen. As seen from kennysia.com's blog showing DAP's "rocket" toy that looks like a vibrator, these guys always create absurd stuff for politics. Its the time to make empty promises. Dang i cant vote yet though.It doesnt really matter who you vote, they always turn out the same, eventually.Its interesting, however to see a prominent blogger-Jeff Ooi contesting in penang though. Should have quite a large support.

Anyways here's CNY pics :D as promised

From back left, clockwise: Jan, Gary, Me, Great-Grandmother and sis - house :D

Me, dad and sis - Vistana hotel

Eating!!! Hawr Hawr

Wahahahaha! poser face

Family Photo!

And oh since i LOVE to eat eat and eat, I might start doing food reviews. Upcoming posts! XD

Valentine's day

Hmm..usually on this date I'll be rambling about how stupid the day is, but unusually I didnt do the same this year. I wonder why :P. In fact, it was the best day I had in a long long time. The ice skating, Ikea, Curve, movie, candlelight dinner and clubbing was such a memorable time. Thanks =) I appreciate it a lot. And especially for the chocs. The wrapping is amazing! Love it so so much. I hope we can get to move on more later on . My mind's only on you at the moment.

Anyways, been MIA-ing for quite some time now due to CNY holidays in Penang and excessive gaming sessions in cc's. I will upload food pics of the gathering in Penang as well. Lets see, what else I havent been updating. Will start working at Toybox from now on on Sundays.Hope it'll be good :P.

I.....need....footie!

Pissed beyond belief

This what I dread and ALWAYS hate. Please dont make me wait and keep on waiting. First of all you wanted that movie and asked me to plan something out. I asked for a date, got the date, and was cancelled, because of some unavoidable casualties by other people. Fine, its alright. We postpone it to next week.

You requested everyone not to watch that show and wait for another friend.On my last day in KL b4 going bck Penang for CNY, sure...plan another meeting for the movie. Few days before, everyone asked for Thursday. Everyone is supposed to be free. But well, as usual plans are not important whatsoever. One forgets about it, one unable to go and one watches the movie in a dvd shop. Very convenient. What did i do for the past week then? Few of my other friends asked me for the movie instead. But what? I said I cant because I promised to watch with them. Family asked as well. I said no too. GOD,was I so stupid. Turns out that they are prominent people who done keep up to their words.Words are not important. DONT PLAN ANY OUTING THEN. Dont keep letting me wait. I aint free for today. Have to wake up early tomorrow, and yet i planned to hang out with you guys. Sure, after work i immediately go to TD. Somehow, AS EXPECTED, the plan never materialises. I have been so patient countless of times. And this is one time too much. Sorry if I have gone over the top,but I'm just not in the right mood to keep everyone's feelings intact. And please do keep up to your words. You dont know what the other party sacrificed just to please you.

Just a random bulletin

SIX LASTS:
1. last beverage- Tesco Ice cream soda
2. last phone call- From Marcus's father asking where is he
3. last instant message- From someone telling me he loves choc too much and he's fat(not even close to "fat" -_-")
4. last cd played- One Republic, Dreaming out loud
5. last time you cried- Recently, not telling why
6. last text message sent to you says- "your maxis caller ringtone has been renewed"

SIX HAVE YOU EVER:
7. dated someone twice- Nope. Never had that chance
8. been cheated on?- I have no idea...maybe
9. kissed someone & regreted it?- Yes and no.
10. lost someone special?- Yes
11. been depressed- All the time
12. been drunk and threw up?- Just high. Not drunk yet
LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS:
13. Baby blue 14. Black15. Turquoise

THIS MONTH HAVE YOU:
16. Made a new friend- Yeah a lot lol
17. Fallen out of love- You can say so
18. Laughed until you cried- Everytime I'm with the TD gang
19. Met someone who changed your life- this month? Maybe in the future. I dont know
20. Found out who your true friends were- Always knew my true friends all along
21. Is there something you want to tell someone- Yes, but not now
22. Have you kissed anyone on your friends list-No
23. How many people on your friends list do you know in real life- A lot. Not even bothered to count -_-"
24. How many kids do you want to have?- Two or three?
25. Do you have any pets?- Yep, budgies, finches and fishes
26. Change your name?- From Colin Tang into Nathaniel Tang =D

RANDOMS
:27. What did you do for your last bday?- Went for Chillis dinner and Resident Evil movie
28. What time did you wake up today?-11AM
29. What were you doing at midnight last night?- Blogging
30. Name something you CANNOT wait for – Miracles to happen
31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life?- My love life. Its so complicated

CURRENTLY:
49. Eating- Nothing.(Makan angin lor)
50. Drinking- Cold water
52. I’m about to- Send pms to few ppl in msn
53. Listening to- Teardrops on my guitar
55. Waiting for- Hell knows what I'm waiting for

YOUR FUTURE:
58. Want kids?- If possible
59. Want to get married?- Who doesnt?
60. Careers in mind?- Finance line

WHICH IS BETTER WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX?:
68. Lips or eyes- Both
69. Hugs or kisses– Errr hugs i guess =D
70. Shorter or taller- Shorter!
72. Romantic or spontaneous- Romantic
73. Nice stomach or nice arms– What a question
74. Sensitive or loud- Sensitive
75. Hook-up or relationship- relationship
77. Trouble maker or hesitant- Hesitant i guess

HAVE YOU EVER:
78. Kissed a stranger- yes
79. Drank liquor- yes
80. Lost glasses/contacts- Nope
81. Ran away from home- nope
84. Broken someone’s heart- Yes
85. Been arrested-Nopes
86. Turned someone down- Yes. ruined a friendship, sad to say

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
89. Yourself- yes
90. Miracles- Yes.
91. Love at first sight- yes
92. Heaven- Yes.
93. Santa Claus- no
94. Kiss on the first date-no
95. Angels- Yes.

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:
97. Is there one person you want to be with right now?- Not really
98. Had more than one boyfriend/girlfriend?- no
99. Do you believe in God?- yes
100. Posting this as 100 Truths?- Well, question 32-48 seems to be missing, so i guess it aint 100 questions LoL

Standing up and moving along

Wow, what another I've had again. Spent my day today boardgaming. It was fun! Lovethe boardgames, although not the explaining bit. Took me around an hour in total to explain Starcraft the board game this time round. Played other simpler ones like jungle speed too. Thankfully I never slammed the "stick" into Joel's face again haha! After that, we finally managed to play Rockband on Ps3 ( it was previously dominated by a few...rather noisy "rockers"). Love the guitars =D. I love relaxing at toybox. For u guys that dont know what it is, it's a shop that sells and also rent boardgames. It also have hobby leagues for trading card games such as WoW, VS and Spoils. Check it out at http://www.toybox.com.my/.


After thinking for quite some time Ive decided to move on. I guess its better than staying depressed all the time,right? I want something that can last. I dont want to be hurt no more. Please save me. I need someone to pull me back up. I'm hidden in an alcove of darkness. Show me and lead me the way whoever that may be. Please be the one for me. Everyone is meant and bound to be together with someone they love. I'm still waiting...I believe someday that person will come. I wont let go that chance again. I want to learn how to love again.





And listen to this : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V2ATJiBowt8
Love this song so so much =D

Helping hand

Here's my latest post but this'll be a short one as I've got no mood to post much.

Celebrated Marc's bday yest. Got him a skele hoodie and a Gerrard poster.Damn shud hv taken pics of it =D

I'm down, facing dilemmas and I'm just very confused. I'm torn inside out. I need a helping hand.....anyone?

Friends

Well, I guess its the time where I post photos of all my friends. Sorry, no pun intended haha. Please ensure you are 18 and above before you view the pix......And if ure not, "the management of this blog will not be responsible to any harm caused by the obscene photos below".






I'm not joking

1st pic: Kelvin trying to look cute on the bunny machine (We forced him on)
2nd: Kien Lin.If only get to see him more often
3rd: Harold with the "dead fish" look
4th: Briyani looking a bit serious. (Crazy monkey who will nvr stay still, very unpredictable)
5th: Marcus, with "sperm" on his face
6th: Ravin aka poser boy.( You look good being vain, u know)
7th: Kali stoning while driving
8th: Richard licking some sperm (its kelv's bday cake la)

They're just pictures of my close friends. Love u guys lol

p/s these pics were taken and posted without permission. Sue me hehe. Or thank me for promoting u guys lol

Loner-Boy

I feel lonely. I feel audacious. I feel....stupid. I have no idea what I'm going through now. Its like every single emotions just got mixed up together in a blender.If emotions were tangible,mine would look like this.


I just despise people who give their opinion of another person when they dont even know them well.(Well, dont I resemble a hypocrite, now then). With all due respect, you are entitled to express freely your opinion. I'm just looking at the moral-side point of view. Of course I'm hurt by those comments. Do I look like someone with bad intentions? I never judged anyone expressly without knowing them better. (I dont always follow that principle,of course). I'm just confused. Even my post for today is confusing. I'm lost, I dont know what to do. I feel like confronting the person involved but I know its not wise. I hope you read my blog and understand how I feel. I dont want this to continue but i cant help it. If you think you know best, the give me a single piece of constructive advice and not just give the final conclusion. I'll gladly appreciate it

On the brighter side, I'll post pics of my trip up in Aussie soon as ive just received the pix =).

Sacrifice

"Sacrificing your happiness for the happiness of the one you love, is by far, the truest type of love" . I got this quote somewhere from the internet and I really do believe in it. I've been keeping up to this for a very very long time now. It really does make me happy to see my family, friends and loved ones being happy. So. I guess I will keep up to this quote. I know I will have to suffer in the end, but i guess seeing everyone happy I will feel happy as well....or will I not

Bad luck charm

It does really seems that Lady luck has abandoned my cause. Everything I've been doing recently does seem to end up in my disliking. Today, woke up with a headache and sore legs. That wasn't so bad. But I've been trying to call one of my Monash lecturers for consultation but he seems to have evaporated. It's really frustrating, taking into account that I've been trying to reach him for almost 2 months. What I did thereafter just does not seem to go my way. Glad the day has ended. Quite a bad start of the new year.

I'm missing Australia and Singapore so badly. Malaysia's like one of the most boring place to be now. Regretted that i chose to be back early. Ended up spending new year shaking my own hands and hugging myself wishing a happy and prosperous new year. Kind of being a loner. Couldnt do anything though, considering all my friends went for their own parties or another.

I'm also really missing someone so badly. Fate has brought us together, and now it has brought us apart. I'm just hoping it will turn out well soon. To you, I love you more than anything right now and I really need you like a heart needs a beat.Missing you so badly.

I'm hating life as how it is now. As Earl Nightingale would say "Our attitude toward life determines life's attitude towards us". I've been trying to adhere to the beliefs of what joy life could enrich us but it never seems justified. Now I do however, believe that the greatest punishment God can impale on us is life itself.

Till then-
(Praying for a better tomorrow)

Back from the dead

Hi there once again, I'm back!(I hope for a long time this time round). Well, let's see where can i start.Oh yep,its a new year 2008! Hope it will be a really great year this time round. I'll recap the year 2007. It all started with the introduction of World of Warcraft TCG into my life. Here's a pic of it. Its my favourite card as well as Hero, Litori. The other 2 pics are popular card like Leeroy and the sexy chic, Lady Jaina.

Then there's the beginning for a new journey, which is my University- Monash Malaysia
Not a place I would exactly enjoy as much as Ausmat had brought us. Horrible beginnings to the education sector( of my life obviously, not the government). Failed Microeconomics(not my fault) and Marketing(I still wonder how i manage to fail it). Boring year, not much friends there. Just Lee,Aaron and Ming Han as my closest friends there. Lee's really as expectedly unreliable though (leave a comment when you read this!) Been keeping to himself all time long. Quite sure even Brian would be frustrated by that.

Luckily I've been together with a new group of friends, thanks to Brian. Was at Taman Desa almost everyday. Futsals, mamaks as well as movie outing and lots of crap activities to keep me entertained. Mostly played in iPlay for Fifa 07 and Counter-strike.

Okies, as for the year ends. I was supposed to go for the WoW championship in US but as my Visa got rejected, what a dent in my hopes of winning something out of the game. Top prize was $100,000 USD. Being Asia's number 1 doesnt matter(Not boasting....really! XD).

As for the year end holidays (which was recently), had a visit to Australia for 2 weeks. Stayed over at Brian's. Awesome trip. Visited a strawberry and cherry farm. Went to 2 beaches as well. Brian's friends organized those trips. Was an awesome time.(Quite sure Brainy boy isnt able to organise something so well planned and well-organised as that). Had awesome dinner at Lygon(Little Italy) as there were amazing amazing pastas. The streets were really cool except for the closing time of shops(5pm) which wasnt cool.Went to the Crown casino as well.

Just came back from Singapore last week. Stayed over at my aunt's for that period. Was one of my most memorable trips ever. Went to Bugis, Somerset and Orchard shopping mania. Even bought myself a F50 boots(reddish orangy colour) for around RM 500.Met up with my friend Eric, and thanks for all the good times there. Will be missing you badly. Neoprints and awesome shoppnig frenzy. Love the way you sing, play the piano and talk.Went to Zouk Singapore too. Awesome place. Went back around 6 am.Here's a pic of me and my so called "uncle"'s friends.

Thats all for now I guess. Better get some sleep already. Updates will be frequent now!Will upload what i bought in Singapore as well as the Aussie trip when i get the pics.Till then. Ciaoz!

~Nate